put downs

Last week the news was full of a story about a heated response to a question which an offended Hillary Clinton made while in the Republic of Congo. There were several reports as to what the question really was and how it may or may not have been mistranslated.

I read the widely distributed account which held that this question, "We've all heard about the Chinese contracts in this country. The interference is from the World Bank against this contract. What does Mr Clinton think through the mouth of Mrs Clinton and what does Mr Mutombo think on this situation? Thank you very much." Was muffed by the translator who substituted "Mr. Clinton" for "Mr. Obama". I also read an account that said that the translator did not err, the questioner had said "Mr. Clinton". I don't think it makes any difference. Both questions belittle Hillary Clinton as a representative of her country and as a woman. They ignore her opinion and ask for the opinions of men implying that those are the only opinions which count. Moreover, the question belittles the US and President Obama for choosing a woman to represent the US.

A few years ago, I was at a meeting of social workers from around the state of Wyoming. At the social hour I was introduced to several people in a group which included a man who was a social worker at the state hospital in Evanston. I shook hands with people as we were introduced. But when I was introduced to this man he said, "I cannot shake hands with you. My religion forbids my touching women who are not family." I smiled and nodded instead, but I felt put down. I also felt like I was on the horns of a dilemma. As a social worker, I try to respect the customs and cultures of others. However, the reason Muslim men do not shake hands with women is to avoid any possibility of temptation. This suggests either that all women are out to tempt them, or Muslim men have so little control that a handshake can lure them into sexual temptation. Ultimately, the message is that women are not to be trusted. I was lumped with all women as untrustworthy. I was right to feel put down.

I am so tired of customs and cultures, nations, cults, religions, sects and individuals who think, say and act in ways which make women second class, less than. It is this kind of thinking and acting which is responsible for violence against women which is pervasive in every country and culture. So I say, "Good for you, Hillary. It was a put down. You were right to be offended. You were right to show it."

Portable

I've started a new project. I'm memorizing poems I love. I think it will be wonderful to carry them around with me and pull one out to enjoy whenever I have a moment. I enjoy graphic art. Having pictures in my house, visiting galleries, taking it in where I find it is a pleasure and an inspiration. But, sooner or later, I have to walk away from it. Their impression fades and is subject to the distortions of memory. Memorized poems will go with me. I can check the accuracy of my memory easily. I can recite them aloud or to myself, share them or not.

I wish I had started this project years ago. I think of all the mind numbing meetings I sat through. I could have been silently, inconspicuously enjoying my trove of loved poems.

Brackets

I filled out my bracket for the NCAA Men's Basketball Tournament. I finished it up on Wednesday. Oh, don't worry. I did the extra game before it was played. Filling out a bracket is one of the harmless pleasures I indulge in like millions of people across the country every year. I don't remember when I started, but know it was long before printable brackets became available online. When I was married, we used to get extra copies of the newspaper so we could both do several variations. Now when it is easy to print multiple copies, I usually just print two, one for me and one for G. who indulges me by filling one out too. Each year I try to engage her or give her something to connect her to all the basketball games I spend my time watching.

Brackets are fraught with disappointment. They are visual representations of the vagaries of counting on young men to do what you predict they will do. Each of the 65 teams is thrilled to be in the tournament. Each wants to win seven more games and become this year's national champion. Given that mix: youth, desire, the potential for glory, is it any wonder that teams that should win don't and teams that shouldn't do? That's why they play the games and that's why people fill out brackets.

Trying to predict the unpredictable can be harmless fun or it can involve the exchange of money in office or other pools. Unknown millions of normally law abiding citizens flout the law and eagerly participate in this ubiquitous form of gambling.I used to take part in the pools at the various schools where I taught, but haven't since I moved to Wyoming. It's probably just as well for this year, it seems like I am doing worse that usual.

Red sky at morning

It's 6:30 AM and the sky is red. What does it mean when the old folk method is at odds with the scientific forecast? Which do we trust? In like a lion, out like a lamb. It's March 1st. What will this month hold?

The color in the sky is fading fast, fading to gray as the dawn becomes day. Portents don't last long.

We are approaching a crossroads in our lives. We'll have to make some big decisions soon. The future is murky. The country is at a crossroads too. These are uncertain times and we all want certain answers. The signposts we have used may have lead us astray.

Do we go with our guts or try to puzzle out the future with lists and charts?

The color has faded and it seems darker out.

Six Little Words

I heard about the six word memoir idea being morphed into the six word love story on NPR's Morning Edition today.


Here's my first stab. These, of course, are for Gail.

You wore Birks. I ran slowly.

High maintenance? Brought my tool kit.


Now you all see what you can come up with.

25 Random things about me.

If you read this you are tagged. If you are tagged you are supposed to make and post your own list.

1. I have two grown children who " turned out well" and are nice people, but I still worry about not being a good mother. I love them very much.
2. Reading is one of my favorite things to do, I will often choose to watch crummy tv shows rather than read a good book.
3. I am a very visual person.
4. I love to go to specialty stores like art suppliers, hardware, tack, fishing gear.
5. I like to make lists.
6. We moved a lot when I was a kid (I went to 6 grade schools.) That had a big impact on me. It was good and it was bad.
7. I knit. I find it relaxing. I want to knit better. I'm working on that. I just started a sampler scarf and another pair of socks. This pair will have cables.
8. I used to be really, really good at trivia games (jeopardy, college bowl, etc.) Now crs.
9. I am the youngest in my family. Most of my closest friends have been the youngest, too, or only children. My husband was an only. Gail is the youngest.
10. I love to go for walks especially in the mountains. I prefer to walk alone so I can go at my own pace. Dogs are optional, but usually they opt to run with Gail.
11. I like to try different foods and new restaurants, but once I find something I really like, I will go back again and again and have the same thing each time. Right now and for about the last 5 years a pork superbowl at Youngs in Ft. Collins is my favorite dish.
12. I am a tea drinker. I hate Earl Grey and Lady Grey tea. I am not fond of most herbal teas. I like black tea with sugar and milk. The southerner in me likes sweet iced tea.
13. I'm left handed but do most things except eat and write with my right hand. People don't say, "I didn't know you were left handed." to me as often as they used to.
14. Sometimes I think I would like to throw all our furniture out and start over.
15. I was born in Alabama and learned to talk with a southern accent. I used to lapse back into it when I talked to someone else with an accent.
16. We have a small rv. It is one of my favorite things. I absolutely love to go camping in it.
17. I am a big fan of KU basketball. I am also a lifelong Red Sox fan. I support the Rockies, but am not passionate about them. Pitchers and catchers report a week from today.
18. I am a good cook. Not great, but good. Just made a wonderful pot of potato leek soup.
19. I love the house to be clean, but am not often motivated to make it that way.
20. I wear socks with sandles. My feet get cold.
21. When I am not sick or injured or it's not icy, I go to the gym 5 days a week at 6 AM. I have for years. I need to work harder while there so I look like I've been going to the gym for years.
22. I love to have my back scratched and my feet rubbed.
23. I love to sing, but don't very often. I just got a new cd for car singing. It's how to sing harmony by ear.
24. Even after a lifetime of disappointment, I still find myself being optimistic about our country and hopeful for the future.
25. I am a morning person and prefer to be in bed by 9 PM. I can stay up late, I just don't like to. I like to read when I go to bed. I can't sleep late. I am up early no matter what. Sadie helps me get up earlier than I might, however.

Almost over

The other night at dinner, a friend asked me if I felt sorry for George Bush now that he was on his way out and his presidency is being called one of the worst in our history. I didn't have to think before I answered "No."

This presidency has done much damage to the environment both by ignoring or perverting science and by allowing rampant greed to determine policy. The presidency has presided over the deaths and maiming of thousands and thousands of our armed forces and the citizenry of Iran and Afghanistan. Our "face" in the world has been greatly diminished. The civil rights or our citizens have been compromised and trampled on. The human rights of prisoners and foreign nationals have been violated. Our economy, which was robust when Bush took office, is in shambles because of favoritism, lack of oversight and greed. Fear has been used to coerce our own people into acquiescence to policies which led to the loss of civil rights and trust of each other. Our immigration policies are oppressive. Our health systems are a disgrace. The culture wars have exacerbated mistrust and hatred among our people. On and on and on.

We are so much worse off than we were eight years ago that I have no compassion, no inclination to feel sorry for George Bush and Dick Cheney at all and am more than happy to see them leave office.

I have hope for the future. I can hardly wait for Tuesday, Inauguration Day.